The Story You're Telling Yourself
You're coming off a heavy season.
End-of-year deadlines. Holiday logistics. Family obligations. That weird stretch between "I should slow down" and "Why does January already feel like a sprint?"
If you didn't do a formal year-end review—what worked, what didn't, what got dropped—you're not alone. And no, this isn't a goal-setting post. You've read enough of those to last a lifetime.
This is about you.
More specifically: How did you show up as a manager and leader last year, and what story did you tell yourself about it?
Because, whether you realize it or not, you're telling yourself a story every day.
The internal voice in your head? It's loud. Persistent. And not always accurate.
For some managers, it sounds like:
"I'm not good enough."
"I'm making this up as I go."
"If people really knew what I don't know, I'd be exposed."
"I can't trust anyone to do this right, so I might as well do it myself."
Here's the real question worth sitting with:
Why does this feel harder than it should?
Often, it's not the workload. It's not the team. It's not even the role.
It's the story you're carrying into every decision, conversation, and crisis.
So before you set another goal, chase another productivity hack, or download another planner: pause.
What story are you telling yourself about your management style right now?
Why Clarity Changes Everything
Clarity isn't soft. It's not motivational fluff. It's a performance advantage.
When you're clear about the kind of leader you want to be, things start to stabilize—even when the work doesn't slow down.
Your team gets trust, focus, and autonomy.
You get confidence, resilience, and better decisions.
Clarity shows up as:
A clear sense of vision and values
Defined roles and responsibilities
Consistent, honest communication
Clear ownership and regular feedback
In other words: fewer fires, fewer second guesses, fewer 2 a.m. mental reruns of conversations you wish had gone differently.
How to Set Yourself Up for Success (Without Overhauling Your Life)
Start small. Seriously.
Write your "why."
A few sentences. Why this role? Why this organization? What matters to you here? Post it somewhere visible. When things feel overwhelming, read it before reacting.
Name 2–3 core leadership traits.
Calm. Direct. Supportive. Decisive. Pick what matters most to you and use it as a filter for your actions.
Prioritize ruthlessly.
Use whatever system works for you, but focus on high-impact work. Often, writing the list alone reduces stress.
Communicate sooner, not later.
Clear expectations reduce confusion, for your team and for you.
When Things Start to Unravel (Because They Will)
This is the moment that matters most.
Pause and notice:
Am I acting the way I want to, or reacting?
What story am I telling myself right now?
It might sound like:
"I'm in over my head."
"I'm behind."
"I don't belong here."
Now ask the reset question:
Who do I want to be in this moment?
Calm. Focused. Steady. A leader your team can count on.
Then choose one small action:
Delegate one task.
Clarify one priority.
Step away for a short walk.
Reset the conversation instead of pushing through it.
The Bottom Line
Clarity doesn't eliminate pressure.
It changes how you carry it.
And when you're clear on who you want to be as a leader, the work doesn't magically disappear, but it does stop feeling heavier than it should.
That's the real reset.
Leave a comment below and let me know what type of leader you are or want to become.
P.S. If you're ready to get clear on the kind of leader you want to be—without the overwhelm—grab my Feeling Stuck at Work- 3-Question Reset. Three questions. Five minutes. A clearer path forward.
https://bit.ly/4hsIIbf
